Between becoming a tattoo artist and my search for a place I could call home, I went through an intense period of inspiration, determination, and political organising to ward off my anxiety towards the ever-looming threat of fascism. But what if the fascism is coming from inside of the house?

The feeling that hit me in Istanbul was very much the same one I had encountered 6 years prior, when I first did my art residency there: Like being on a ship, elated, but seasick with anxiety. Frantically trying to make sense of what I was experiencing, I finally became desperate enough to be honest and owned up to my year-long obsession with my former lover.